I had a dream where I couldn’t remember where I lived.

Yesterday was an awful day with PCOS pains. I won’t gross you out with details. But I spent most of the day in bed and slept. That’s all you can do on those days. I have about one or two out of the entire month. I took a pain pill last night before bed and just woke up. The drugs certainly make you sleep more. But not only that – oh my – they produce wild dreams.

I just woke up from a dream that’s still fresh and vivid in my mind. I was in a new apartment – this isn’t the first dream like this. I’ve had nightmares where I’ve moved into slum apartments without doing research. I had one dream so often that I had convinced myself I had moved into an apartment and moved out and left all my furniture there. But I know that isn’t possible. I’ve only moved TWICE in the last twelve years.

In the dream, I was meeting up with a friend for dinner. I looked around my apartment which was empty. There was beige carpet on the floor. All the furniture I had in there was my old green couch from the 70’s, and a tv cabinet I had never seen before. What? I have way more furniture than that.

As I inspected the carpet, I could see that it wasn’t firmly in place and there were bulges that appeared to be moving as though some giant rat or other rodent was living under it. I ran out of the apartment screaming and found myself sitting on bench near an elevator in a mall.

My friend Louise walked by. She sat down on the floor. She was maybe drunk? I couldn’t tell. “Please just leave me alone, I need to just sit here for a minute and rest,” she said to me.

I shrugged my shoulders and left her alone while I looked through my purse for some identification. Or something with my address on it. I couldn’t remember my new address! I asked Louise is she knew but she was sleep already on the floor of a busy mall.

There was a purse sitting on the floor beside – a navy blue purse. Two women came up to us frantic, looking for a lost purse. One grabbed it. She was wearing a navy dress like my mom would have worn. She even had dark hair like my mom. “Oh thank god,” she said as they scampered away with the purse in hand.

I looked over at Louise who was still snoring like a baby on the dirty floor. I searched through all the texts on my phone – the old Android I had at my old apartment. I couldn’t find any mention of my new place.

I decided to hop in an Uber car and maybe a drive close to the area would jog my memory. I got up to say goodbye to Louise. She just muttered at me and said “leave me alone,” – not like her at all. When I came back to the bench – I thought I saw some envelopes I might have dropped. My hands were full of notebooks and other things I don’t remember having with me. My dreams are weird like that.

There was a pile of vanilla envelopes on the bench with red pen written all over them. I peaked at them.

“No shows” was scribbled all over one.

“Just okay” was scribbled all over another one. And other comments like, “passable” or “potential hire”. There was a large red binder with a name written on it that said, “actually walked out of the interview.”

I considered sticking around to find out who was doing the hiring and for what position. But it was getting late and the mall was closing. I looked over to say goodbye to Louise again – but she was gone. There was no sign of her. I shrugged my shoulders and headed to the elevator.

Next thing I know I’m in the back of an Uber. The Uber pulls up to 17th avenue – which is really far south instead of 117 street – which is an area I’m considering moving to in the spring if I can afford it.

I got out of the car and realized I was at some kind of Aboriginal lodge. There were buffalo and other animals all around me. The driver and I watched as this herd of sheep and baby cattle roared through the sandy road. I looked up at him as if to say, “Did that really just happen?”

I wish I could tell you what happened after that – but I woke up drenched in sweat and it was time to get out of bed. I slept in way past the normal get up time of 8:00 am. It’s almost time to take another pill. I think I’ve slept enough for the last two days. I don’t want to spend the entire day in bed!

Honestly, sometimes these dreams just leave me scratching my head. It felt so real. And now I’m wondering what the hell building I moved to – so I can avoid it?

How have your dreams been lately?

Happy Thursday. There’s a photography post coming your way shortly.


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